Taking a Stand

I'd like to ask you these:

1. When given choices, do you find difficulty figuring out what to choose?

2. After you had made the choice, do you have regrets? Or are you happy about the choice you have made?

3. Are you a person who loves to stay always in the middle?

On Making Choices

"Life is what we make it."

I absolutely agree to the above quotation. The choices (big or small) we make each day affect our lives. Most people would blame others for their misfortunes but if we closely examine the situation, it is not actually the other people who cause our successes or failures . While it is true that some people may inspire us but Thomas Edison clearly stated before, "Success is 99% perspiration and only 1% inspiration."

Work Ethics

What is the key so that you will be considered an asset to the organization/company where you belong?

Proper work ethics is my answer. As one author puts it "The secret of life is not doing what one likes but to like that which one has to do."

What about you, what is your answer to the question I gave?

Favorite Poem

What is your favorite poem?

Mine is "Salutation to the Dawn" by Kalidasa. Are you familiar with the poem?

It is a Sanskit proverb for senerity and peace written by Kalidasa, famous Sanskit poet and dramatist.

Salutation to the Dawn

by Kalidasa

Look to this day!

For it is life, the very life of life,
In its brief course,

Lie all the verities and realities of your existence

The bliss of growth

The glory of action

The splendor of beauty.

For yesterday is but a dream

And tomorrow is only a vision,

But today well lived

makes every yesterdayA dream of happiness

And every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Look well, therefore, to this day!

Such is the salutation of the dawn.

NCAE

I was assigned at TNHS as an examiner for the NCAE. I have had 30 examinees. NCAE is National Career Assessment Examination (NCEE before). It is designed to assess students' as to what field they are inclined to. The result will be their guide taking up a course in college.

Ironically, most students have finished the test ahead of time. It is as if, they just make guesses. So after the test, I have questions in mind which I'd like to share to you.

Do the youth of today have a vision of what their future would be? What are their plans for the future? Are they finding ways to reach for their dreams?

A Visit to Palompon

Yesterday, Auntie Ely and I left a home around 7a.m. Our destination is Palompon but we made two stops before reaching the place. First, we dropped by Silad, Villaba. Ate Danah waited for us there. Second, the three of us (Auntie, te Danah and I) went to Tagbubunga, Villaba to fetch our would-be tourist guide - Tita Lor.

I studied Kindergarten in Palompon. In 1986, Palompon was a very familiar place to me. In fact, I can go around on my own around the town without me being lost. It is 2008 already. As far as I can remember, after Kindergarten studies, I seldom visit Palompon. The last time I can recall was when I was in third year high school.

Because of the length of years when I have not been there, I felt like I miss the place and I am sure there are many changes which I have to see. So that I would not be lost, I asked Tita Lor to go with me. Ate Danah liked the idea of going with us, Palompon is not a familiar place to her too.

Monday is Palompon's market day (tabo). We enoyed buying wet and dry goods. I really love to visit places. There is something in traveling that excites me. When you travel, you braden your horizon, right? You meet different kinds of people, you can observe varied customs, etc.

Well, I have only been to some parts of the Philippines. Going abroad is only one of my wishes for now. Someday, I know I will be able to fulfill that dream...

Adventure to another hometown

I will tell you about it tomorrow. I really have a headache. I need to rest early... Just read my previous entries, if you wish and post comments if you have time. I am reserving a big room for feedback. I believe, constructive criticisms would help me grow more as a person.

Lessons Learned from Reading

Here is what I have learned from what I read today:

"There are two philosophies of life:

1. feast and then the headache

2. fast and then the feast

Deferred joy purchased by sacrifice is always the sweetest."

My perfect examples of persons who made use of the second philosophy are my parents. I always say "I will not be what I am now if not because of my parents." That is really true. My parents have instilled in my head the value of sacrifice. They made use of teaching by doing. They made sacrifices for them to be where they are now. They are both indigent individuals. Yes, they were not born with silver spoons and gold plates. They walk a number of miles before just to reach school. My mother (Rene, Nene to her friends)helped in selling dried fish, carrying the basket on her head. She did not mind what others say, what she knows is that she had to do it so she can study. My father (Abraham, known as Jun to his friends) helped too in planting rice, making copra, etc so he could earn a degree.

Had they followed the first philosophy, we, their daughters will also have the same kind of life as what they had or even more miserable. We are not rich in terms of money but the values my parents have passed to us (their daughters) are more than any gold could buy.

Favorite Book

What is a book that greatly influenced your life?

Given this question, what is your answer?

In my case, aside form the Bible, it is the book entitled "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale. It was in my second year college when a classmate narrated the effect of this book to his life. Convinced by him, I borrowed a copy of the book.

That book really made a difference in my life. There are two great results I have gained by reading that book, these are optimism and confidence.

Butterflies

Yesterday evening, a brown butterfly entered my room. Nanay Felisa (younger sister of the mother of my mother) was the one who saw it first. She has this belief that butterflies bring news. So she said, "butterfly for whom is the news you have brought? Will you fly and stay near that person." Should i say luckily or unluckily? Let's be positive. Luckily, the butterfly stopped flying and stayed on the ceiling directly aligned to my head. Brown butterflies bring money, that's another belief. Whatever is the meaning of the butterfly visit, the effect to me was more of a reminder.

A butterfly signifies a male. A flower is to a female. Butterlies fly around or even near a flower. A flower oftentimes enjoy its presence especially if it is multi-colored but no matter how hard a flower prays that a particular butterfly would stay, it just cannot be.

A friend sent me this message before:

"Once there was a butterfly in my palm, but I let it fly not because I do not love it but because I wanted it to enjoy with the flowers and the bees. Keeping it in my palm won't make it the best butterfly it can be, so from a distance I am happier watching it fly and play in the garden while the sun is still shining 'cause when the rain comes, i'll know, if it truly loves me, it will fly back to me..."

Personally, I enjoy the presence of butterflies hovering around me but I've already had my part of loving and losing. Because of that experience, my senses were opened - that a butterfly comes and goes. Yes, but there will always be one butterfly who would stay rain or shine with you. Well, that butterfly may be out there still, someday (in God's time) that butterfly will be able to find me.

Greener Pasture

A lot of people would look for a greener pasture, right? Does this question ring a bell to your head? Of course, we want a BETTER LIFE... or a COMFORTABLE LIFE.

Have you closely observed goats? If you are from a rural place like me, I'm sure you already did. When you place a goat in a fence, it would look for ways to jump to the other side of it. Why? It is because a goat always looks at the other side as greener as where it is.

There is nothing wrong to dream big, bigger or even biggest but you need to make considerations or weigh the pros and cons of your choices. Say for example, a man left his girlfriend because he exchanged her for a rich one. After a few months, the man wanted to return to the previous girlfriend because he realized a lot of things. One of these realizations is that money is not the answer to all his needs and wants. Who is that man? He is no one else but my ex-boyfriend! What he failed to see, is the that he gave up love in exchange of selfish desires. He thought he would still have the girlfriend (that's me) when he decides to return. He confessed, he had a miserable life when he left me. Oh well, that's what we call as bad karma. You think I caused him to be miserable? Absolutely not! He chose to be in that situation. How could he desert the one he loves? He still has a face to come back? Oh come on! Does he have any decency?

So, if I'll have to write an essay for him, I would entitle it with LOOKING FOR A GREENER PASTURE, ENDING IN A DESERT.

Putting People in a Box

Have you heard of the expression "putting people in a box"? I bet, you already have. How often were you correct in doing so? We are fond of calling people names or labelling them as this and that. When we do that, we are putting them in a box.

Human as we are, it cannot be avoided sometimes but we have to practice not to do it for a very simple reason, so people will not do the same to you. If you want to compete, just compete with your own self. What I mean is, find ways to make yourself better (if that is your aim). Do not use others just for you to be in the limelight. If you will be putting people in boxes, the number of boxes you have already used, will be the number of boxes which will be used against you....

Technical Problems

Had a hard time accessing to my blog and even to the other sites. When I inquired from ate Jojielyn, she told me that Globelines has a problem with its submarine cable.

It is totally difficult when we are dependent with modern gadgets. When a problem such as low connection arises, our patience is tested. Why? We are used to one click then we get what we want. This serves as an eye opener that no matter how advance technology is, still there are times that what you want, you just can't get it easily...

It's a Holiday Today

To those who want to see a close up picture, here is it. Is it really that close? Anyway, this was taken last November '07 at LAIS, Leyte, Leyte during the Regional Press Conference of the School Publication Journalists and Advisers. I had fun with co-publication advisers. The sashes and trophies we have in the picture are the wins of the Leyte Division Contestant for Miss Reg'l PressCon.

Yes! It's a holiday so we did not have classes.

I enjoyed singing songs with my aunt, having tutorial classes and recording scores of the students.



I find time to enjoy too, 'cause you already know the adage "All work without play makes Johny a dull boy."



I'm afraid this might not be posted 'cause the internet conection today is very low so I will just keep this entry as short as possible.

Day Off

I told you before that I always keep myself busy, even during weekends I have tutorial classes with kids and high school students.

Today is quite a different one, I cancelled my tutorial classes in the afternoon so can go with aunt Ely, Nanay Peling (sister of my grandmother) and Crisella (working student). We went to Liog2x to gather shells (or should I say clams?).

Lao Tse said you will never go wrong with nature. Precisely, what he said is correct. whenever I feel so stressed or if I have problems I just spend time looking at the sea. In this way, I regain strength and have peace of mind.

You might say, "Sayang!" (Waste of time.) Well, supposed to be I will have 5oo pesos in just one afternoon if I had my tutorial classes but the quality time I have spent with my aunt and granny is more than the happiness 500 pesos can give. My grandmother and Aunt come to Tabango rarely so I give them time when they are here.

I did not bring my cellphone when we went to Liog2x. My friends sent me messages, some of them told me, they have checked my blog. Two of them told me, they can hardly see my picture. I intentionally did it. Maybe some other time, I will post a close up picture. I actually wanted to emphasize that my write ups are more important than my picture. I believe a picture is only a semblance, it is never worth a comparison to what is real.

Teaching: Not a bed of Roses

Teaching is not a bed of roses. While it is true that there are roses, there are more thorns than petals...



You now ask, why did I prefer to be a teacher when in fact I know such reality. What are the thorns of teachers?

Thorn # 1. Low Salary

Thorn # 2. Not all students will treasure what you are teaching.

Thorn # 3. Seeing students not giving importance to their studies.

Thorn # 4. Few teachers (correct me if I am wrong) are like crabs, when they see you on top, they will look for ways to pull you down.

Thorn # 5. Paper works



There are still many other thorns but let us just have five for now. I believe these are the most common thorns.



Do not stop reading yet, you might think I am really very pessimistic about teaching. Come on, if I am pessimistic about it, why am I teaching until the present?



Have you seen a rose already? I am very sure you already have seen its different varieties.
When you see a rose like this, where is your focus?Is it on the thorns? I doubt if you do. I am certain, your focus is on its beautiful flower. So, why am I teaching still, it is because no matter how many thorns are there, seeing a budding rose gives joy to my heart.

On Education Part II

"The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet."
Aristotle

I adhere to this quotation. Education entails a lot of sacrifice. What is lacking for most students today is detrmination. Most of them are like driftwoods, they just float on the water and don't care where its flow brings them.

But if you remember well, there is a saying that "education is a lifelong process." Though we finish a degree already, learning does not end there. Every single day provides an opportunity for us to learn. We are all students and our EXPERIENCES are our best teachers.

We grow each day, if we just open our senses widely. Surely, the choices we make define our present and future. I do not say, I am a person full of wisdom already. I still have reserved a huge room for learning.

Many of us only decide to change or learn when we are faced with traumatic situations already. Do we really have to wait for such to happen before we do what is right?

On Education

It is the schedule of our periodical test today and tomorrow. My subject's schedule was at 2:30 to 4p.m. For almost 3 years with Department of Education, you know what I've witnessed in terms of students efforts during the test is disheartening.

If you are a teacher, you know what I mean. For the sake of those who are not, making a periodical test is not easy. There are many aspects you need to consider and most of all, the cross of most teachers is the making of Table of Specification (TOS). Teachers take days before they finish a test.

What is disheartening? Students submit the test within only five minutes. How could that be? Something is really wrong with most students. It seems to me that they do not know the importance of education and that they do not have a clear vision of where to go and what to do with their lives.

I still can clearly picture out what my classmates and I do when we know that a teacher will give a long test especially if it is a periodical test. We burn midnight candles. During vacant periods, we take turns in having a Q & A.

In fairness, there are also good students but there are only a handful of them. I wish students really will give value to their education. Education indeed has helped me a lot. Having a good scholastic record, work looks for me ( I mean it!). After graduation, I had a chance to work at my alma Mater. When I decided to work with DepEd, schools heads were trying to convince me to work at their respective school. Parents ask me to tutor their children after school and during week ends. Writing opportunities knock on my door.

If these students, want to have a better life than what they have at present, EDUCATION is the KEY.

Eureka!

I thought I have lost my entry last Sunday. Now i found it. I have posted it at my secondary blog. You may visit it too. It is at http://mpasayloon.blogspot.com/.

I have a very important lesson today. My coteachers asked me if I had photocopied my testpaper already. I told them, I haven't but I was about to. They asked me to include their's when I will send my testpaper to Tabango Printworks. Well, they know that Ate Jojilyn is my friend. They have this belief that when I will be the prioritized (that's their belief only, Okay?). Anyway, I sent the testpapers and a letter thru Lutchie, a fourth year student. Since my test is at 2:30 tomorrow, I have indicated that their testpapers will be risographed first.

My coteachers really felt happy for the favor I have granted them. I included in my letter too that the operator of Tabango Printworks may send me a message through text if all the testpapers were already risographed. At past 11 in the morning, I received a message. I was told something went wrong with their risographing machine. I responded "Don't you have any solution to the problem? Please inform me between 12 - 1p.m. if you can't address the problem so my coteachers and I will be able to look for other means..."

I did not receive any reply so Tita Lor decided to go to Tabango Printworks 'cause she was so worried since her subject is the first in the list of subjects to be taken by the students. When she came back to school, she told me that all of their test papers were risographed except the last page of her test. What is so surprising? Mine was not started yet...

I don't know why I did not feel upset. I just told her, that's life. When you try to help others, you really sacrifice your own. The other coteacher (Ate Merl) told me "Hala day ang imo nuon ang wa natrabaho" (The one which was not risographed were your testpapers - she used a sad tone in saying those words.) I still replied the same lines I've uttered to Tita Lor. So I sent a mesage again to the operator: "Do inform me if you will be able to work on my testpaper. I will wait until tomorrow morning." Another coteacher sounded antagonistic. She suggested, I should get my testpapers and have it photocopied instead.

I still preferred to be optimistic. Tonight, I received a message from the operator that he'll work on my testpapers tomorrow early in the morning 'cause the risographing machine is already okay.

This situation opened my eyes to reality that optimism really works and that when you help others you will really be rewarded. Of course, many times the reward do not come easily but if you learn how to wait, you will really appreciate its essence.

Ways to Keep Oneself Busy

As I have promised, we'll continue the topic yesterday. Remember what sister Pia said? Very well, now sometimes there is really a temptation to just stay idle, right? Think of ways to keep yourself busy.

In my case, when I'm done with works to be done in school or at home these are what I do:
- read books or magazines
- write (an entry in my journal, a poem, or a novelette)
- prepare exercises for tutorial classes
- play the keyboard (organ) or guitar
- sing songs
- cook food

Obviously, I do not do all these at one time. I just choose one of these for me to have something to do. You too can make your vacant time fruitful, right?

Keeping Oneself Busy

Have I told you I was about to enter the convent? Not yet, I was an outside aspirant of Daughters of Saint Paul way back in 2001-2003. I had a great time with the sisters at DSP Tacloban. They were so kind to me. In fact, some of those who join the search in told me they can see the bias of the sisters because it seemed to them that I am very dear to the sisters. Nevertheless, our decisions change. After graduation in college, I had an opportunity to work at my Alma Mater. I accepted it. I enjoyed teaching and I realized I could serve God better when I teach.
One of the lessons I have learned from the sisters is to keep ourselves busy. In doing so, you avoid sin, that is what Sister Pia said. From that time I heard those words, I can't forget it anymore.
Of course, it does not mean to say that you will not take a rest. After all, sleep is the best weapon to keep you young and make your antibodies active. What Sister Pia means is that, during your working time, you have to give your best. She adheres to this quotation "Doing ordinary work extraordinary well."
Got to continue my conversation with you tomorrow. That's all that I can say for now.

Realizations...

I am indeed a neophyte in terms of blogging. I have encoded an entry for my blog last night. When I tried to read it today, I can't find it. I'm pretty sure, I really made one. My focus that time was about the Gospel yesterday. Do not wonder why the topics are varied, after all this is a tete-a-tete. Well, this is between you and me.

About life? Where do I start? Or how should I start? I'm a rational person. Yes, I always seek for answers to any event or situation that I do not understand. Oftentimes, I got answers but there are really questions that take many days before an answer is found. Sometimes, there is no answer at all...

That's life! At the age of 26, I have many realizations in life. I don't claim to be philosophical or a person full of wisdom. I'm still reserving a room for more wisdom. I have realized that:
a. Not all you want is what you get.
b. In life, no matter how good you are to others, they always have something to say.
c. Not all questions have answers.
d. In loving a person, you do not always get the same kind or amount of love you have given.
e. Not all love stories have happy endings.
f. In some cases, both of you are in love with each other, but there are circumstances that
hinders you to show or express that love.
g. Our choices define our life.

Any realization of yours too?

My Grandparents

Got questions about the title? I grew up living with my parents and grandmother at home. This grandmother is the mother of my mother. At present she is already 87 years old. What is her secret of a long life? It is very simple - she is very careful with her food intake. She eats vegetables. She eats meat but at a very minimal amount. Take note, her eldest brother is still alive too. He is around ninety years old.
This grandmother told me that she has a sister who left Leyte. She does not know where she is. This sister has never even written a letter after she left. In fact, we already included her name when we pray for souls in Purgatory.
Until one day last year, an old woman came to our house looking for my grandmother. She told us, she left Leyte 50 years ago. She was with her youngest daughter who is around 40 years old already. Guess what? My grandmother and this woman have recognized each other despite of their physical appearance. When they were face to face with each other they hugged and tears welled in their eyes.
I really wondered how they recognized each other. Remember, it was fifty years ago that they saw each other. My grandmother told me, it was not the appearance that she looked into. She felt something in her heart. She knew from the heart that the woman who came is the sister who was lost 50 years ago.
It was a very touching experience. It proved that while our eyes can see the physicalities of a person, our heart can perceive beyond what our eyes can actually see. This situation reminds me of a line from the book "The Little Prince": "It is only from the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Life's Challenges

Life is full of challenges. Every day is a new one, a gift which is coupled with challenges. I can't forget the words of my favorite professor in college, "You are not excused of life's challenges. Jesus himself had undergone sufferings while He was on earth but these challenges should not hinder your faith in God and your will to move on with life. No matter how good you are, people have always something to say about you. Why worry about what they say? So long as you know what you are doing is right, you have to go on living.
From that time he told me so, until today, these words are like the tintinnabulation of bells. These serve as my guide to move on. I have had my share of loving and losing. It was never so easy but like a diamond, it never shines until it's polished. I take all the trials I've been through as ways for me to grow more in wisdom and courage.
I always try to do the best that I can in any aspect of my life. For others, my best may not be good enough but I'm still consoled at the end of the day 'cause I have not given any rooms for what ifs.
For those who accept me as I am, I thank them for doing so. They make me feel very special. For those who have caused me heartaches, I still thank them, I could not be much wiser than who I was before. I am far from being perfect, I don't claim to be one. I have my strengths and weaknesses but beyond my imperfections, I am really a loyal friend...

Making Decisions

Everyday we are faced with choices to make. Whatever we choose affects our present and future. I believe in these lines

"I am the master of my fate,

I am the captain of my soul."

Yes, it is really true but have you been faced with really difficult choices? Like you're confused whether to follow your head or your heart? Or you have a part-time job which starts at 6p.m. and you've got a student who needs to be brought to the hospital.

The latter is what I experienced this evening. It was totally difficult because I really make it a habit to be on time. But how could I leave a student because of my work? If something wrong would happen to her, my conscience will be guilt-stricken. Dothy (the student who got sick) is from a far-flung barangay in Tabango. She has symptoms of dengue. She is only staying in a boarding house.

What did I do? Tita Lor (my coteacher) and I brought her to the hospital. The doctor said she has to be admitted but we requested that since her parents are not yet around, she will just be given medicine.

I informed my superior via landline that I would be late.

She may not understand me but for me, I did what I have to do as a Christian. Remember the parable of the Good Samaritan? Well, you may not really call me a Samaritan. What matters is, I have given no rooms for what ifs. No matter what happens to my student, I already did what I have to do...

Day 3

Yehey! I've fulfilled my targets today. These are, to make a table of specification and a periodical test for 2nd year students, to conduct classes and have a meeting with the school publication staff, to have tutorial classes with Diane, and to study the CD.

Two co-teachers said that they might not be able to meet the deadline on Monday because they have a lot of things to do. In my opinion, it is just a matter of making priorities or practicing good work ethics. In my case, I am as busy as a bee but I see to it that my work in school and other special assignments are being attended to.

Day 2

I love to teach but it is very disheartening sometimes 'cause even if you have invested much efforts students find it difficult to learn. Take this for example, my lesson with the second year students today is on /i/ and /I/ sounds. Most students interchange the sounds. These studnets are not exposed to TV channels that are using English as their medium. They also have very limited resources at home. Their parents cannot teach them 'cause they also do not know.

I'm sorry to say, these students are really victim of circumstances. Most of them are sons and daughters of people who married at an early age. People who only focus on today and have "bahala na" attitude.

These students must know that studying is their responsibility. It is for them anyway. They have to break the chain of irresponsibility...

Prelude from a Neophyte

Blogging? I have never thought of doing this until I was asked by a renowned person if I have a blog. I love to write. Yes, I really do. I've kept a diary since I was in high school. Whenever I have new experiences - may it be sad or happy, I write about it. I never intended to share those with anybody except for few trusted persons.

I have read about Lea Salonga having a blog. She is one of the persons I admire. Not because some say that I have resemblance of her facial feature, but because I like her the way she portrays the meaning of the song when she sings. Avid fans of Lea, I guess would agree with me.

Anyway, I have decided to give it a try. I am a very busy person but despite of being busy I still find time to write. I do not enclose learning within the classroom alone. The best teacher after all is still experience. I love to learn from people's experiences. I wonder if someone will read this... as I've said I am just giving it a try.

Just in case, you come across this blog, I am open to suggestions. As a neophyte, I am opening a big door for learning...